Only Sin Deep
by nemurii
Summary: Arthur couldn't distinguish himself from Francis anymore; heaven hardly held its charm, and earth's hellish beauty was remarkable, as long as he was with Francis. Francis was a human, but would always love this angel, no matter how brief their time was.


**Only Sin Deep**

Maybe I'm not thinking correctly, but his tears, and his scent, is making my heart fumble, and the words are trembling on my lips. Would I be able to say it to him?

I close my lips, the warm look on his face something I don't want to disrupt. I could think of millions of words to describe him, but like usual, I'll recite them over and over in my mind, to myself.

I move my nose closer, a flush pink, and let my fingers feel his peach skin- his neck, his cheek, his jaw- and bury my tremulous smile into his collarbone, the warmth reminding me where the sun really is. I press a palm to feel his heart.

"Stop hiding." He growls innocently.

A fluttering from behind me pulls us both out of our reverie. A pain drags out slowly, and my breath begins to shake again. I press myself into him, as I break into groans and cold sweat.

An angel's wings were disgraces- they ripped through the human body without remorse, time and time again. No matter how long I pretended I was human- they were devilish reminders of a world I'd never live in. As the pain grew, and his grip tightened, I thought of this- this romance we had, of the feelings in my chest, the ones he'd never know of.

I had so many questions, and he gave me a smile as if telling me he had every answer.

That's probably what I first fell in love with.

"Arthur, get out of your head and come tell me what you're thinking."

If you ask anyone, I have a certain brash way with myself. Somehow, since I've met this man, nothing's been particularly sensible, and I don't always feel like myself. It's a warming, but unnerving thought.

"I'm thinking about you." I muttered after the pain subsided.

"So am I. Are you okay? How long do we have left?" Francis' eyes were a deeper blue, I noticed for the millionth time this night. I couldn't pull myself from their depths.

I couldn't lie down, unless I want to scream in pain once more. The moon was staring into the waters that ran deep, the murky blue rivers next to Francis' estate.

I thought to myself for a moment, as the bitter winds comforted me and chilled me at once.

"The pain has grown to be tolerable. Don't think about it. We have a few minutes left." I turned to him, radiance shining still in his eyes.

"What a painful thing it is to ask, but here I am asking anyways- can you to stay any longer?"

I looked briefly through his room- its' brilliance still, as my thoughts darkened; perhaps his ornate room-_ no_, his ornate world- would darken with me. I could only hope. His royal golden sheets, expansive paintings, the rich blues and lace whites of his attire, along with the formidable wooden furniture, rich curtains- none of it changed.

No, nothing ever changed.

"Answer me this; am I a mortal creature?" I asked. A small smirk on his lips, as the breath of my words floated an icy white, like a ghost, out the window and into the world.

"_Non._" He hardly held the glass of wine in his hand, and took a large sip before raising his eyes to me once more.

"There's your answer." He stood, and swept the air out of my lungs with every graceful step.

"What will it take for you to understand that we are bound together, entertwined for all of eternity?" He brought one of his hands into my own shamelessly- his eyes almost begging for something.

"Everything." My whispers were like water molecules, and they evaporated as he kissed me. I growled, unwilling to let myself go. He held my waist, and pulled me to him, regardless.

I melted, and what was I to think except _'is this real?'_; he tasted like smoke and lilies, and smelled like anything but the earth from which he came. It was an intoxicating elixir- his life, his soul.

He wished to sap away every inch of my life from me, I decided as he continued with his kisses. I pressed harder, unwilling to let it deter me, and yet almost willing to give him all of my life.

"I am to return to heaven once again- enough playing with humans." I said to him, a playful glint transpiring between our eyes. He still held me close.

"You're human to me." He detected my weakness to his voice- his words plunged straight into my heart, and he knew.

"And we aren't just playing, are we?" His lips graced my ear as he whispered, before kissing me deeply. I bit back a moan and held onto his wrist, almost to hold onto dear life.

"No, but I've never been one to truly trust your kind." For some reason, I spat the remark cruelly, and yet he wasn't surprised. He wasn't hurt by it.

"Sometimes I wonder if you are even real- are you just a dream, and if so, whose? Are you even what I want? Or is my reality whatever my subconscious creates? Are you here, Arthur?"

Francis' words masked in thick veils hid either immense beauty or inexplicable sorrow. I hung on to them, thinking.

"I'll be here. I _am_ here."

"So then the only question remaining is- why did God give me an angel?"

Francis held me in his arms, his words so far away as they floated past me. I wanted to look at him, but I feared it.

"A better question is why he made you who you are. If we are _destined_, as you so claim, why are you a human-" His grip tightened on me, as my disdain was spoken suddenly. I sighed as he spoke again.

"I didn't ask to be born a human." His tone had deepened. I wasn't sure what to make of it.

He was the paragon of a tainted existence, and I was enamored with him. Who was I to question how he came to be?

"Sorry." I mumbled. He pulled back, his lips stretched into a large smile.

"I wonder it often, myself. Don't feel bad. I'm rather confused- you've been less yourself today, I'm afraid."

"That's folly. I'm not always interested in fighting with you, Francis. I can be serious at times." I couldn't look at his smirk any longer.

I hissed suddenly, our conversation cut short. With nothing else to guide me, I knew our last moment had hit. It was instinct in my mind; it was that unspoken bond to the heavens that told me I must go. I wasn't one to defy orders.

"I've always wondered if angels really dwell in heaven. Tell me, are you cooped up in there as if it's your own personal hell? Do you have space to spread your wings? Is that why you come to see me so often?"

Francis let his usual remarks trail into the air as I was bent over the floor in pain. He stood above, watching. His eyes softened, and the pain had stopped once again- our time was over.

"You haven't the right to know. I'll come once again." I spoke slowly as I stood to my feet once again.

"Do come visit me, it's rather unpleasant here, by myself." He pulled me into a hug once more- our parting not at all bitter or sweet. His hands that held me were met with blood that dripped from my wings and back.

A rush of emotion was readable in his eyes as I turned to leave.

"I love you."

I told him- the words had been in my mind the whole time. I feared the truth of those words would leave me the moment I voiced them into the real world. He has told me that he loves me millions of times, and I, frightened, never said it back. They were as necessary as flowers are to a tree's bark- they are as true as the sun and sky, and as natural as the oceans that would never end, and seemingly never begin.

He gave me a deep kiss, our bodies hardly given room to breathe, before I began my descent. With a whimsical look in his eyes, he watched through his window. He mouthed the words back to me, and as I continued, I felt a profound brilliance in everything else that was dreary in the universe, if only for a moment.

The clouds and luminescence of the gloaming I soared through were in the least bit comforting as I left him. Yet I knew this wasn't something to dissever the two of us from our romance. I felt a warmth envelop my cheeks, and tears sting my eyes as I continued my flight.

Was I one of the luckier angels to have found this man, or was I a doomed one? I felt a quickening desperation at my mad thoughts.

I wanted to hurt something. I sighed at my irrational feelings as they bounced back and forth on their heels. I wanted to ask Francis' if he heard the beating of my wings at night, whenever I flew, my feelings for him a mellifluous constant from above.

I reprimanded myself on those nights in which I escaped the life I was bound to forever- I'd tell myself heaven could wait. I'd let dissolution taint and plague me; in the form of this man I've grown to love.

With a slowing of thought and heart, I arrived at my destination. Heaven was idyllic wonderland that grew awfully boring over the centuries.

I still found reverence for its mass beauty, however. As I continued to my own home in this place, I picked up a damask rose as I did every time I walked this path from Earth; so I won't be as lonely.

It smelled like everything but heaven. It was beautiful.

* * *

><p><strong>author's note <strong>(_please read!):_i hope this was clear and not too sloppy; this was written a long time ago, and i have been reading novels from the nineteenth century lately, so their speech was kind of, well, old-school, i guess? too me it sounded that way- but not too much. no time period set in this fic, however! i hope this was as enjoyable to read as it was to write. i really liked this piece, however confusing or short it was. i know i don't write the best, but hopefully someone enjoyed it/liked it.

no harsh criticisms please. if you liked it or have any opinions, (or if there's any mistakes!) please review! makes me happy, and willing to write more in the future. thank you very much! C:


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